Ben from It's That Sober GuyHi, I am Ben, I am 42 years old, and I never dreamt that I would become sober. Alcohol was culturally part of my life. it was what I used to celebrate the happy times and forget the sad.

No lowest point made me get sober, but many low points within a 20-year relationship with alcohol, eventually made me realise something had to change.

I’ve suffered from anxiety for as long as I can remember, but it was not until I stopped drinking that I realised how entwined my mental wellbeing was with my addiction.

I had tried previously to give up drinking but had never succeeded, often convincing myself after a few weeks that things were not that bad, I would always end up having a relapse, and be back where I started.

Then one day I decided to give myself a 4-week break from alcohol, so something changed, I never drank again….


What had changed was my thinking. Rather than focus on what I was missing out on, I started to focus on the positive things that sobriety brings. This shift was enough for my journey to begin.

Shortly after getting sober, the country went into a national lockdown, due to the coronavirus pandemic. This gave me the time that I needed to concentrate on myself, I watched online as many others were reporting that their drinking was increasing, and I had finally taken control over mine.

Sobriety has brought me many positives, but one of the challenges was the change to my friendship group and feeling isolated.

For this reason I set up the community It’s That Sober Guy. A chance for people to come together online, to post about all things sobriety, mental health, and wellbeing.

I have done so much more sober than I ever would have drunk, I have been to my first rock gig, taken public transport to London to meet new sober buddies, and even been on a sober holiday!

I finally found out that the alcohol that I thought made life fun was the very thing that was sucking the fun out it.

While my mental health and anxiety are not perfect, there is a noticeable improvement now compared to when I was drinking.

Three and a half years into sobriety, I have come to realise that this journey has just started, I love talking to both men and women about their addiction, sobriety or moderation of drinking.

I believe with all my heart that we all have the power to help others. and through communication and changing the way that we think, we can achieve anything.


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